Women are Aroused by Cucumbers and Carrots According to an Islamic Cleric

Muslim, sex, vegetables, Cleric, IslamA Muslim Cleric in Europe has stated that cucumbers and carrots prompt women to have seedy sexual thoughts and that they should therefore be banned from touching them.

Women should be banned from touching cucumbers, carrots, bananas, and zucchinis, says a European Muslim cleric, simply because they resemble the male penis and could prompt women to think of sex.

The Sheikh whose name has not been revealed, according to Bikya Masr, has suggested that women who need to cook with these ingredients should have the men in the family cut them up into small pieces. This shape-shift will reportedly banish all sexual thoughts from women’s minds.

Asked how they should avoid wanton thoughts while shopping for groceries, the cleric retorted that this is between “them and God.” Does this mean that men should stay away from pomegranates and peaches?

:: Bikya Masr

image via morguefile

About Tafline Laylin

As a tour leader who led “eco-friendly” camping trips throughout North America, Tafline soon realized that she was instead leaving behind a trail of gas fumes, plastic bottles and Pringles. In fact, wherever she traveled – whether it was Viet Nam or South Africa or England – it became clear how inefficiently the mandate to re-think our consumer culture is reaching the general public.Born in Iran, raised in South Africa and the United States, she currently splits her time between Africa and the Middle East.Tafline can be reached at tafline (at) greenprophet (dot) com, @teakettle22, http://www.facebook.com/tafline.laylin

26 thoughts on “Women are Aroused by Cucumbers and Carrots According to an Islamic Cleric”

  1. Bradarmshit says:

    What the fucking fuck? How can a human with a functioning brain forbid women from eating/touching MOTHERFUCKING CARROTS? ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME?
    And this ladies n’ gentlemen is the reason why i’m gradually leaning away from my religoin that is islam.

  2. Mohamad Arfhan says:

    I know some women used bananas and cucumbers when the are horny. I think this fatwa is good.

  3. إِنَّ هَذِهِ تَذْكِرَةٌ فَمَن شَاء اتَّخَذَ إِلَى رَبِّهِ سَبِيلًا

    إِنَّا عَرَضْنَا الْأَمَانَةَ عَلَى السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضِ وَالْجِبَالِ فَأَبَيْنَ أَن يَحْمِلْنَهَا وَأَشْفَقْنَ مِنْهَا وَحَمَلَهَا الْإِنسَانُ إِنَّهُ كَانَ ظَلُومًا جَهُولًا

  4. Pef says:

    Can any here help with info on good job recruitment sites for moslems? Or referrals.

  5. kalen says:

    Hey, am muslim and all that are B.S.
    we want to know the sheik name and the source
    of this B.S. subject, please do not believe every
    thin posted

  6. stuart says:

    Are these people for real?????

  7. soumaya says:

    I always get so horny when I see a cucumber!!!! No but seriously, I think this cleric has a deep secret sexual frustration. He should consider acknowledging his true sexual preference!

  8. soja says:

    May be she got erected when holding the cucumber imagining herself holding a penis.

  9. LOL! Maurice I’m totally cracking up on that last comment!

  10. Maurice says:

    I wonder what that cleric thinks about melons or tomatoes?

  11. Shaanju says:

    Sick people only spread such news.

  12. sonia says:

    Get Real!!!!! This is NOTHING TO DO WITH ISLAM, HOW SICK!!! Why they are not mention his name? Media!Media! Media!! keep trying to put Islam down, really is so sick!!! It make me so sad because this is most complete,beautiful religion. Full of decency and modesty and common sense………………. oh! how sick!!!!!!

  13. Jeff says:

    Does this apply to gay men?

  14. jonathan says:

    I guess the cleric never saw a banana….

  15. Maurice says:

    Reminds me of something out of a Henry Miller book:Tropic of
    Capricorn. But I won’t go into this in mixed company.

  16. John says:

    What a joke… are you serious ????? Ive been living in K.S.A for the past 5 years and i have never heard of this “Fatwa”. Must be an anti-vegetables cleric ! or maybe he is ashamed of his manhood size compared to the vegs…lol 🙂

  17. Clerics of all religions have always found ways to set limitations on women, including where they are free to go and how they may dress. This ridiculous ruling is just another way of letting women know that men think they have all the power and will use it try to keep women under their thumb.

  18. Yitzhak Levinson says:

    The European Muslim cleric is mentally sick

  19. Sherifah saka says:

    This is unrealistic,this is just a framed lie to stop muslim women from eating carrot and cucumbers.It is halal!!the thought of these looking like manhood is the last thing that will ever occur to a sane woman.this is deceitful sisters!they want to make halal haram for us.They dnt look alike!!!The creator has made it distinguished!!!

    1. It is probably just an idea of someone from the margins. i am sure the reasonable clerics won’t go for this nonsense. In some countries the cucumbers are sold ultra-tiny, like in Israel. They are about the size of a pickle. Maybe we should suggest that smaller cucumbers enter the market to reduce the threat?

  20. Zaufishan says:

    If it gets me out of the kitchen domain, whoop. I don’t like the look of my vacuum either, get a man to do it.

    #WhenStupidityTakesOver

  21. l says:

    But think of the psychological damage done to the men chopping up all those phallic cucumbers!

  22. Tinamarie says:

    Only very fresh veggies will do. Women are not interested in, um, cooking, with soggy ones. Just saying.

  23. Yeah, I’ll never be able to look at a carrot the same way again.

  24. Sounds more like the “seedy” sexual thoughts of men at work here. Or maybe they want to have all the fun in the kitchen?

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